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Software Vault: The Gold Collection
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┌────────────────────────────────────
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│CISSUE #131 - May 24th 1993C│A
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in 41 St
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310-371-3734 12-9600 A
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Brought To You By:
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(c) 1993A
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Your SysOps &
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CCP.O. Box 331C│
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Beyond Eternity
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BBS, Contact The Editor #5 │
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(c)19
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93
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(310)-371-3734 12/24/9600 or 370-9464
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3/12/2400│
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Eeeek Publ
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Publishing Co │
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(Taghadoss
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i/Black)
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PO Box 331 Manhattan Bch,CA 90266
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RESERVED
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"Keep On Ee
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eeking!" (Philip Fultz) │
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│ Little Known Facts...........Page 4 The Cod
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e Of Love.............Page 30 │
│ HeadLine BITS!...............Page 5 TV Triv
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ials..................Page 33 │
│ First Things First...........Page 6 The Jok
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er's Lair 2...........Page 34 │
│ Behind The HeadLines.........Page 7 WeIrD n
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EwS...................Page 35 │
│ Mind Games 1993..............Page 10 Interes
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ting Origins..........Page 36 │
│ Whatta Coinky Dinky!.........Page 11 Numerol
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ogy...................Page 37 │
│ Presidential Facts...........Page 12 Great O
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ne-Liners.............Page 38 │
│ Horoscopes By Manfred........Page 13 UNpredi
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ctables...............Page 41 │
│ The Joker's Lair 1...........Page 19 Quotes
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'N' Notes 2...........Page 42 │
│ Quotes 'N' Notes 1...........Page 20 Quick Q
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uiz...................Page 43 │
│ Daily Statistics.............Page 21 Signs O
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f The Times...........Page 52 │
│ State of The Union...........Page 22 Bodily
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Functions.............Page 53 │
│ Idiot Savants................Page 27 Dimensi
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ons In The Dark.......Page 57 │
│ Be PercentageWISE............Page 28 Team Ee
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eek - Continued.......Page 62 │
│ Oh SWIFT! BITS!..............Page 29 Strrrrr
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rrange BITS!..........Page 67 │
│
┌────────────┐
┌────────────────
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─────┐
┌──────────────────────┐
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┌────────────┐
│
│
│ CHAT BBS! │
│AVATAR ONLINE SY
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STEMS│
│▀▀▀ WESTSIDE BBS! ▀▀▀│
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│ TOP CITY │
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│ A Friendly │
│ (818)-969-8227
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N81 │
│ 60+ Phone Lines... │
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│ BBS │
│
│
│ Place In │
│ Professionl Tut
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ors │
│ ASP Member! │
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│ SysOp: │
│
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│ Cyberspace!│
│32 Lines, Family
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BBS │
│SysOps: Dave 1, Walt 2│
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│ RamSoft 1 │
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│ 2 FREE WEEKS TR
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IAL! │
│Call: (213)-933-4050 │
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│612-225-1003│
│
│
└────────────┘
└────────────────
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─────┘
└──────────────────────┘
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└────────────┘
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Little Known Facts
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
On the average day in the U.S. (accordin
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g to The National Center for Health
│
│
Statistics,) 6,567 couples are married,
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and 3,197 couples are divorced!
│
│ Your risk of being robbed is the greatest in
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Washington DC, where the risk │
│ is approximately DOUBLE that of California!
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│
│
The flu, Influenza kills about 70,000 Am
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ericans every year.
│
│ 12% of the top executives in America never we
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nt to college. │
│
1 in every 3 Americans is making less th
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an $5.00 per hour.
│
│ According to a recent Gallup Poll, most women
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think men desire a thin lady,│
│ but the men actually want a more average weig
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ht woman. │
│
For 186 days each year, the sun is not s
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een at the North Pole.
│
│ The words "naked" and "nude" are NOT the same
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; Naked implies unprotected, │
│ while Nude means unclothed.
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│
│
N.Y. was the first state to require lice
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nsing of cars, in 1901.
│
│ In 1915 the average family income in the US w
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as $687 per year. │
│
No one knows where Mozart is buried.
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│
│ A thousand TONS of meteor dust falls to Earth
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every day. │
│
If all the blood vessels in a single hum
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an body were stretched end to end,
│
│
they would form a rope capable of going
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around the world.
│
│ Spiders, believe it or not, have blood which
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is transparent. │
│
In San Salvador, drunk drivers are punis
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hed by death...a firing squad.
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ HeadLine BITS!
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ * An Ad: Beautiful wedding dress, never used
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, fits 7-9, $200/OBO; wanted │
│ maternity clothes, 8XX-XXXX Betty
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│
│ * Ad: Sexually aggressive teen-age girls Bes
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t gifts for men │
│ * Ss. Peter And Paul To Show Pornography Film
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│
│ * Wisconsin Bill Would Permit Blind To Hunt D
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eer │
│ * Crappie Derby Set For March
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│
│ * Some Pieces Of Rock Hudson Sold At Auction
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│
│ * Fort Collins Fails In Quest For Bigger Dot
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On Map │
│ * 4-H Cow Pie Bingo To Be Held At Kittson Cou
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nty Fair │
│ * Woman Scolded For Killing Husband
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│
│ * Wife Regrets Staying With Man She Killed
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│
│ * Man Discovers He Left Wife At Local Station
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│
│ * Wedding announcement: Last-Fling To Marry
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│
│ * Wedding announcement: Hogg to marry Hamm
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│
│ * Wedding announcement: Wong-Wright Announce
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d Wedding Plans │
│ * Tax collectors Decide To Leave Dead Man Alo
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ne │
│ * Dead Man Remains Dead
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│
│ * Dead Man Gets Job Back
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│
│ * Dead Man Still Goes Duck Hunting With Pal
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│
│ * Dead Man Found In Cemetery
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│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ First Things First!
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ THE FIRST:
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│
│ College was Harvard, founded in 1636
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! │
│ Public school, Boston Latin School,
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founded 1635. │
│ Woman doctor of medicine, Elizabeth
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Blackwell, N.Y. 1849 │
│ Skyscraper was the Home Insurance Co
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., Chicago 1885 (10 floors) │
│ Electrocution of a prisoner was 8/6/
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1890 - William Kemmler in N.Y.│
│ Postage stamps were issued in 1847.
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│
│ Bank established was the Bank of Nor
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th America, Penn 1781. │
│ Subway was opened in Boston in 1897.
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│
│ 5 & 10¢ store was Woolworth's, in 18
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79, Utica N.Y. │
│ Vaudville Theatre was the Gaiety Mus
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eum, Boston 1883. │
│ Woman to walk in space was Dr.Kather
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yn Sullivan in 1984 │
│ Woman to ride in space was Dr. Sally
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Ride in 1983 │
│ Steam heated building was the Easter
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n Hotel in Boston, in 1845. │
│ Circulating Library was in Philadelp
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hia, Penn in 1731 │
│ Color cartoon was "The Yellow Kid" i
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n New York World in 1895 │
│ Commercial oil well was in Titusvill
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e, PA in 1859 │
│ Science museum was in South Carolina
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in 1773 │
│ State to abolish capital punishment
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was Michigan in 1847 │
│ Woman graduate of law school was Ada
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Kepley, Chicago in 1870. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Behind The HeadLines!
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ HeadLine: I Hear It, But No One Is There!
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│
│
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│
│ Story: A woman in England found a great reli
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ef after a visit with her doc-│
│ tor. Her story began with the hearin
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g of footsteps behind her as │
│ she walked down the uncarpeted hallwa
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y in her house; but when she │
│ turned around to look, no one was the
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re. Then she actually began │
│ hearing a heart beat. When she visit
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ed her doctor she found out │
│ she had been wearing her hearing aid
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backwards and the footsteps & │
│ heart beat where her own, not some gh
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ost's. │
│
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│
│ HeadLine: The Alien Invasion Has Begun, Or H
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as It? │
│
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│
│ Story: In a small town in Texas the citizens
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were frightened by the │
│ appearance mysterious purple blobs th
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at showed up on the ground │
│ the morning after a meteorite shower.
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The U.S. AirForce sent out │
│ space officials to investigate. A fe
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w days later the people of the│
│ town, all certain they had been invad
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ed by an alien lifeform, found│
│ out they had nothing to be concerned
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about. The Museum of Science │
│ and History informed them that the pu
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rple blobs were nothing more │
│ than leftovers from a battery reproce
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ssing plant. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ How much would YOU pay (or DID you pa
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y?) for this system? │
│ -------------------------------------
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-------------------- │
│ 386-33 SX SYSTEM:
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│
│ -------------------------------------
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-------------------- │
│
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│
│ Complete with...
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MC/Visa ACCEPTED! │
│
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We'll Ship in 48 States! │
│ 4 Meg RAM (SIMMS)
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C
(Shipping Charges Extra) │
│ Teac 5.25" diskette drive
A
C
╔═══════════╗ │
│ Teac 3.50" diskette drive
A
C
║ ┌───────┐ ║ │
│ Super I/O+IDE 2/2 HDD/FDD Controller Card
A
C
║ │ 386-SX│∞║ │
│ Conner 121 MB Hard Drive
A
C
║ │ 33MHz │∞║ │
│ 1024x768 .39 SVGA monitor
A
C
║ └───────┘ ║ │
│ Trident 8900 SVGA Card w/1 MB
A
C
╚══╤═════╤══╝ │
│ Mini Tower case w/200W Power Supply
A
C
┌─────┐╒══╧═════╧══╕ │
│ 101 Enhanced Keyboard
A
C
│∞∞∞∞∞││ ▀ ▀ ▀ ▀ ▀ │ │
│ 3 Button Mouse
A
C
┌┴─────┴┴──────────┬┴──────┐ │
│ DOS loaded
A
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│ ■■■ │ ───── │ │
│ 1 full year parts & labor warranty!
A
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│ ║║║║║║║║║║ │~~~~~~~│ │
│
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└──────────────────┴───────┘ │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ IF YOU PAID MORE THAN $1050.03 You Didn't Cal
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l Eeeek BYTES! (310)-371-4260 │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ How much would YOU pay (or DID you pa
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y?) for this system? │
│ -------------------------------------
A
C
-------------------- │
│ 486-33 DX SYSTEM:
A
C
│
│ -------------------------------------
A
C
-------------------- │
│ Complete with...
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C
│
│ INTEL CPU
A
C
MC/Visa ACCEPTED! │
│ 256K Cache Memory
A
C
We'll Ship in 48 States! │
│ 4 Meg RAM (SIMMS)
A
C
(Shipping Charges Extra) │
│ Teac 5.25" diskette drive
A
C
╔═══════════╗ │
│ Teac 3.50" diskette drive
A
C
║ ┌───────┐ ║ │
│ Super I/O+IDE 2/2 HDD/FDD Controller Card
A
C
║ │ 486-DX│∞║ │
│ Conner 121 MB Hard Drive
A
C
║ │ 33MHz │∞║ │
│ 1024x768 .39 SVGA monitor
A
C
║ └───────┘ ║ │
│ Trident 8900 SVGA Card w/1 MB
A
C
╚══╤═════╤══╝ │
│ Mini Tower case w/200W Power Supply
A
C
┌─────┐╒══╧═════╧══╕ │
│ 101 Enhanced Keyboard
A
C
│∞∞∞∞∞││ ▀ ▀ ▀ ▀ ▀ │ │
│ 3 Button Mouse
A
C
┌┴─────┴┴──────────┬┴──────┐ │
│ DOS loaded
A
C
│ ■■■ │ ───── │ │
│ 1 full year parts & labor warranty!
A
C
│ ║║║║║║║║║║ │~~~~~~~│ │
│
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└──────────────────┴───────┘ │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ IF YOU PAID MORE THAN $1445.14 You Didn't Cal
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l Eeeek BYTES! (310)-371-4260 │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Mind Games 1993!
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
N
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OTES
│
│
X F D O P E R A C T K F R Y X
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X V K
SCALE
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┌────────────────────┐
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│
│
D E K P L K H H H G N T Z E W
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Q R N
CLEF
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│
This Week:C
│
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│
│
P L A U I A S O N G J U A R S
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O O U
STAFF
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│C│
│
│
U C E N H N T H J P Y G G E G
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T C L
SONG
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│
These are things
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│
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A S D K H V T N W F X T N I B
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S K A
LYRICS
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│
Having to do with:
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│
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T C I E R F B W E L J F Z J C
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N K C
REST
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│
-------------
│A
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│
│
H I O L L F N W M M F F E G S
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Q V I
SONNET
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│C
M U S I CC
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│
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Y R A C H A W G D U U X V E T
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S N S
OPERA
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│
-------------
│A
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│
│
J Y K T S V C B D N Q R S X A
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Y J S
BLUES
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│
How Many of Them
│A
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│
│
Q L K Z D I L S G J Z P T M F
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W A A
JAZZ
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│
Can YOU find...?
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│
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H N Z S Y S D W E F E S Z S F
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O Z L
ROCK
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└────────────────────┘
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│
│
E P K E N I C W A Z S F O B N
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B Z C
DISCO
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│
│
T D R U O M T F B E D G Y N R
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I C K
CLASSICAL
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┌────────────────┐
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│
│
T D C L H Y G S T E Q B H J N
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B N W
PUNK
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│ COMING IN JUNE │
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│
│
P S F B P R H O B D B P A H L
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E S L
BEAT
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│ -------------- │
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│
│
U U B S M U N V K J B T C I P
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A T F
ORCHESTRA
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│ Watch For The │
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│
│
J O R Z Y A R T S E H C R O N
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F H H
SYMPHONY
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│ BIG Eeeekle! │
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│
│
X D D I S A A Z T O O M D N A
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B R D
BAND
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└────────────────┘
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│
│
I
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NSTRUMENTAL
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Whatta Coinky Dinky!
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
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│
│ THE BULLET THAT FINALLY FOUND ITS MARK!
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│
│ In 1893, Henry Ziegland of Honey Grove
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, Texas, jilted his sweetie │
│ who then committed suicide. Her brother, in a
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n effort to avenge her death, │
│ shot Ziegland...but the bullet only grazed hi
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s face and then buried itself │
│ within the trunk of a tree. The brother, thi
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nking he had killed Ziegland, │
│ committed suicide himself. In 1913, Ziegland
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was cutting down the tree │
│ with the bullet in it - it was a tough job so
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he used dynamite, and the │
│ explosion sent the old bullet through the tre
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e and then through Ziegland's │
│ head - killing him, at last.
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│
│
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│
│ TIES BEYOND TIME AND PLACE!
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│
│ In 1953, Irving Kupcinet, Chicago Sun-
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Times columnist, checked into │
│ the Savoy Hotel in London to cover the corona
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tion of Queen Elizabeth. He │
│ opened a drawer in his room, and found some p
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ersonal belongings of an old │
│ friend of his, Harry Hannin of The Harlem Glo
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betrotters. Two days later, │
│ Hannin sent a letter to Kupcinet from The Hot
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C
el Meurice, in Paris. Hannin │
│ wrote, "you'll never believe this, but I've j
A
C
ust opened a drawer here and │
│ found a tie with your name on it." Kupcinet
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had stayed in that particular │
│ hotel room a few months earlier!
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│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Little Known Facts About the Presidents!
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ * James A. Garfield was the first man to beco
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me president who had been a │
│ minister prior to being elected.
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│
│ * James Garfield was the first president to c
A
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ampaign using more than one │
│ language to campaign.
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C
│
│ * Chester A. Arthur was challenged as to his
A
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citizenship and ability to │
│ hold office as president. Many believed he
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was born in Canada. │
│ * Grover Cleveland's real first name was Step
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hen. │
│ * Benjamin Harrison had the nickname of "His
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C
Hirsute Highness." │
│ * William McKinley had the campaign theme of
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C
"Full Dinner Pail." │
│ * Theodore Roosevelt was the first president
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C
to visit a foreign country │
│ while in office.
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│
│ * William Howard Taft was the first president
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to hold office over 48 states│
│ * Woodrow Wilson was the first president to e
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arn a Ph.D │
│ * Woodrow Wilson also was the first president
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to have two daughters married│
│ in the White House.
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│
│ * Warren Harding, middle name Gamaliel, had a
A
C
cabinet that was nicknamed │
│ "Poker Cabinet."
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│
│ * Calvin Coolidge, first name really was John
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, was the first president to │
│ be sworn in by his father.
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│
│ * Dwight D. Eisenhower was the 1st president
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to appear on color television │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Horoscopes By Manfre
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d! │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
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│
│
Aries
[Mar 21 - Apr 19] Attr
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action between you and another intensifies
A
C
. │
│ This may be the big week for you! Words may h
A
C
ave to be said to a friend or │
│ roommate, just keep calm & it'll be ok! Scen
A
C
ario highlights love and │
│ romance! Pisces can be counted upon!
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│
Taurus
[Apr 20 - May 20] Emp
A
C
hasis on security, financial settlement, b
A
C
asic │
│ values. Something missing in a relationship
A
C
will now show up! The new │
│ spotlight focuses on purchases, financial ben
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C
efits, and the completion │
│ of a task that's been on your nerves. Aquari
A
C
us very involved. │
│
A
C
│
│
Gemini
[May 21 - June 20] Ex
A
C
pect the unexpected now. You'll find that
A
C
│
│ you have a new lease on romance. Highlights
A
C
are trips/visits and even │
│ possibly a surprise this week. Pisces is in p
A
C
icture. │
│
A
C
│
│
Cancer
[June 21 - July 22] S
A
C
omeone who has very strong feelings for yo
A
C
u │
│ confesses! A secret rendezvous could put a sm
A
C
ile on your face for a very │
│ lonnnnng time. Focus on physical attraction,
A
C
sensuality, creativity, │
│ variety this week. Leo will be involved.
A
C
│
│
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│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Horoscopes By Manfre
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d! │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
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│
│C
Leo
[July 23 - Aug 22]
A
C
Focus on your uniqueness and creativity!
A
C
Your │
│ search for love waits down the road a bit. Be
A
C
Patient! Travel should be │
│ avoided at all costs. Sagittarius has somethi
A
C
ng important to say! │
│
A
C
│
│C
Virgo
[Aug 23 - Sept 2
A
C
2] A transaction that you've been waiting
A
C
for will │
│ finally be completed, and it will exceed your
A
C
wildest dream. Focus on │
│ physical attraction, sensuality, creativity,
A
C
variety this week. Be │
│ discreet, no sense taking chances with things
A
C
which may be harmful. Leo │
│ very involved.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│C
Libra
[Sept 23 - Oct 2
A
C
2] Business may flow over into evening hou
A
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rs.... │
│ Romantic adjustment featured. Creativity high
A
C
lights the days, Romance in │
│ some of the evening hours! Cancer wants somet
A
C
hing from you now. │
│
A
C
│
│C
Scorpio
[Oct 23 - Nov
A
C
21] Sending flowers or a small gift to a l
A
C
ove is a │
│ great idea! Love is in the air & a woman fin
A
C
ds you appealing! Your │
│ sex-appeal is high now & you'll be almost irr
A
C
esistable! Capricorn has │
│ something important to say!
A
C
│
│
A
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│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Horoscopes By Manfre
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d! │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
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C
│
│
Sagittarius
[Nov 22 - D
A
C
ec 21] Highlights are trips/visits and pos
A
C
sibly a │
│ surprise soon. Aura of sensuality is present
A
C
along with abundance of │
│ sex appeal. The week is accented with spirit
A
C
uality & the ability to see │
│ things as they really are! Aries, Libra has s
A
C
omething important to say! │
│
A
C
│
│
Capricorn
[Dec 23 - Jan
A
C
19] You'll find someone you are attracted
A
C
to is │
│ involved, could inspire you. This week would
A
C
be a good time to get │
│ reacquainted with something you've set aside
A
C
for awhile. There is │
│ something you've been putting off, it's time
A
C
to take care of now. Cancer │
│ wants something from you.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│
Aquarius
[Jan 20 - Feb
A
C
18] Your search for love waits down the ro
A
C
ad a bit. │
│ Be Patient! Looks like that purchase is now
A
C
possible, go ahead, Enjoy! A │
│ financial adjustment is being considered that
A
C
will substantially benefit │
│ you somehow... Capricorn, Sagittarius is in p
A
C
icture. │
│
A
C
│
│
Pisces
[Feb. 19 - Mar.
A
C
20] Travel should be avoided at all costs.
A
C
Someone │
│ who has very strong feelings for you confesse
A
C
s! Your search for love waits│
│ down the road a bit. Be Patient! Scorpio, Leo
A
C
plays prominent role now! │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ TO DO's (Our Picks Of Places To Go & Things T
A
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o Do!) │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ The Palace (Club) 1735 N. Vine
A
C
(213)467-4571 │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ English Acid (DANCE) 7699 Santa Monic
A
C
a Bl (213)969-2503 │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ Florentine Gardens (DANCE) 5951 Hollywood B
A
C
l (213)464-0706 │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ Knott's Berry Farm Buena Park
A
C
CA (714)220-5200 │
│ ---------------------------------------------
A
C
----------------------------- │
│ Sea World San Diego
A
C
CA (619)226-3901 │
│ Universal Studios Hollywood
A
C
CA (818)508-9600 │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ Cabrillo Marine Museum 3720 Stephen Whi
A
C
le San Pedro (310)548-7562 │
│ ---------------------------------------------
A
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----------------------------- │
│ CA Museum of Science 700 State Dr. Ex
A
C
position Pk (213)744-7400 │
│ Hollywood Studio Museum 2100 N Highland
A
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Ave (213)874-2276 │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ The Comedy Store 8433 Sunset Blvd
A
C
(213)656-6225 │
│ ---------------------------------------------
A
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----------------------------- │
│ The Comedy & Magic Club 1018 Hermosa Ave H
A
C
ermosa Beach (213)372-1193 │
│ The Comedy Club 49 S. Pine Long Be
A
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ach Ca (310)437-5326 │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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│░░│ Eeeek BITS! Has been around 3 years now, a
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nd we are in 40 U.S. states│░░│
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│░░│░░│ years old, $40,000+ yearly, White-Colla
A
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r job, & consider them- │░░│░░│
│░░│░░│ selves computer-literate. (Results from
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ongoing surveys in EB) │░░│░░│
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A
C
Beach, CA 90266 - OR - │░░│
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at a rate you can afford! │
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atct The Editor 5 on Beyond │
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A
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│
│ Eeeek Publishing Co
A
C
mpany │
│ P.O.Box 331, Manhattan Be
A
C
ach, CA. 90266 │
│
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│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ The Joker's Lair # 1
A
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
A
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│
│ A man was sitting by himself in a crowded bar
A
C
, and a very attractive red- │
│ head walked up to his table and said, "Excuse
A
C
me, I'm not trying to be │
│ forward, but I hate to sit by myself in a bar
A
C
, and I'd like a little quiet │
│ conversation. May I join you?". The man eag
A
C
erly accepted and offered to │
│ buy her a drink. After a few minutes, the wo
A
C
man jumped up and screamed │
│ at the top of her lungs: "NO I WILL *NOT* GO
A
C
BACK TO YOUR HOUSE WITH YOU! │
│ WHAT KIND OF WOMAN DO YOU THINK I AM!?!?!" an
A
C
d stomped away from his table.│
│
A
C
│
│ The man was completely mortified and extremel
A
C
y confused, since he had not │
│ said anything to which she could have possibl
A
C
y taken offense. After about │
│ ten minutes the redhead returned to the man's
A
C
table and said: "I'm sorry │
│ for causing you the embarrassment, really, bu
A
C
t I'm a psych student, and │
│ that was an experiment in nonverbal communica
A
C
tions. I was studying the │
│ reactions of everyone for a paper that I am w
A
C
orking on. If you'll accept │
│ my appology, I'd like to buy you a drink to m
A
C
ake up for the whole thing." │
│ The man thought about it for a few moments, t
A
C
hen stood up, knocked over │
│ his chair, and screamed at the top of his lun
A
C
gs: │
│
A
C
│
│
"FIFTY DOLLAR
A
C
S!?!?!?!"
A
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Quotes 'N' Notes
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1 │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
"The object of war is not to die for youA
Cr country but to make the other
A
C
│
│ C
bastard die for his." - General GeoA
Crge Patton (1885 - 1945)C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "Poets have been mysteriously silent on the s
A
C
ubject of cheese." │
│ - G.K.Chesterton (187
A
C
4 - 1936) │
│
A
C
│
│
"A life spent making mistakes is not onlA
Cy more honorable, but more useful
A
C
│
│ C
than a life spent doing nothing." A
C- George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "Of all the wild beasts of land or sea, the w
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C
ildest is woman." │
│ - Menand
A
C
er (342? - 291? BC) │
│
A
C
│
│
"Dogs come when called; cats take a messA
Cage and get back to you."C
│
│ C
- Mary BlyC
A
C
│
│
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C
│
│ "What is youth except a man or a woman before
A
C
it is fit to be seen." │
│ - Evelyn
A
C
Waugh (1903 - 1966) │
│
A
C
│
│
"Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilA
Cities. Truth isn't."C
│
│ C
- Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)CA
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌──────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────────────────
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┐
│ Daily Statistics, U.
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C
S. │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
ON AN AVERAGE, *EVERY* SINGLE DAY IN THI
A
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S COUNTRY:
│
├───────────────────────────────────────┬──────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ 16,300,000 people eat at McDonalds. │
A
C
4,110 Americans start smoking!
A
C
│
├───────────────────────────────────────┼
─
A
C
───────────────────────────────────┤
│
36,000,000 MILLION stamps are printed.│
A
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24 Americans die of AIDS. │
├
─
───────────────────────────────────
A
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───┼
─
───────────────────────────
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────────┤
│ 673,693 Americans have a birthday. │
A
C
23 lbs of heroin are smuggled in.
A
C
│
├
─
───────────────────────────────────
A
C
───┼───────────────────────────────────
A
C
─
┤
│
1,932 American kids are kidnapped.
A
C
│ 868 Americans enlist in the Army
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────
─
A
C
┼───────────────────────────────────
A
C
─
┤
│ 958,904,110 photocopies are made...& │
A
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356,164,384 are unnecessary!
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────
─
A
C
┼
─
─────────────────────────
A
C
──────────┤
│
24,274 foreigners visit the U.S.
A
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│ 1 new motion picture is released.
A
C
│
├
─
───────────────────────────────────
A
C
───┼
─
───────────────────────────
A
C
────────┤
│ The president earns $547.95 (DAILY!) │
A
C
1,562,739,726 cigarettes are sold.
A
C
│
├
─
───────────────────────────────────
A
C
───┼───────────────────────────────────
A
C
─
┤
│
80,000,000 Aspirin tablets are taken.
A
C
│ 225 people have nose jobs.
A
C
│
├───────────────────────────────────────┼──────
A
C
─────────────────────────────
─
┤
│ 6,082 complaints made to the B.B.B. │
A
C
209 bankruptcy filings are made.
A
C
│
├───────────────────────────────────────┴──────
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──────────────────────────────┤
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ State or Not!
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ Most of us are aware of the bill Ted Kennedy
A
C
is pushing to make the city │
│ of Washington D.C. a state. According to his
A
C
bill it would be called the │
│ state of Columbia. It would be represented b
A
C
y two senators and one Con- │
│ ress person. What is the motive behind this?
A
C
Some say it is because Ted │
│ Kennedy wants to make it a state because it w
A
C
ould almost guarantee Jesse │
│ Jackson, a co-liberal, a seat in the Senate.
A
C
Mr. Jackson is pushing very │
│ hard to get this bill passed along with Mr. K
A
C
ennedy. One can only assume │
│ the reason is because Mr. Jackson finally fou
A
C
nd a location that just might │
│ put him into the public office he desires so
A
C
badly. Others say the reason │
│ is because of Ted Kennedy's recent breech in
A
C
the law and profit. That │
│ breech is of course the buying of land in Was
A
C
hington D.C., in which no │
│ other parties were permitted the right to bid
A
C
once Ted placed his bid for │
│ this land. After getting the land Ted turned
A
C
around and leased it back to │
│ the federal government at well over a million
A
C
dollars a year. This is │
│ clearly a violation of ethics and is illegal
A
C
under the laws of our country.│
│ Whatever the true reason for the BIG PUSH to
A
C
make Washington D.C. a state, │
│ it is our opinion this is an error and would
A
C
compromise the governmental │
│ process; here's why:
A
C
│
│ Washington D.C. was originally established as
A
C
the capital of this nation │
│ through the Residence Act of 1783. It is 10
A
C
square miles in size. The │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ State Or Not!
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ forefathers of this nation felt it important
A
C
to have a location that would │
│ be free of political compromise.Its populatio
A
C
n since its founding has grown│
│ in part because it annexed Georgetown. Howev
A
C
er, in the last 20 years its │
│ population has decreased rather than increase
A
C
d, dropping as much as 20 per │
│ cent.
A
C
│
│ But even this is not the reason we believe it
A
C
shouldn't become a state. The│
│ really reason is because of its economic stru
A
C
cture. Economically it is │
│ totally dependent upon the government of the
A
C
U.S. In other words, its │
│ economy is based solely upon the government a
A
C
nd government employees. To │
│ permit it to become a state, would certainly
A
C
compromise the process of │
│ government and would certainly end up having
A
C
a direct effect upon their │
│ economic structure, yielding a benefit that n
A
C
o other state in the Union can│
│ claim.
A
C
│
│ The whole point of having a national capital
A
C
not be part of a state or be │
│ a state of its own was and is to maintain the
A
C
business of government in an │
│ unincumbered manner as the result of laws of
A
C
the state and or dictates by │
│ the state.
A
C
│
│ Whatever Ted Kennedy's motive to push this bi
A
C
ll we believe it is wrong. If│
│ you believe this also, write your senator and
A
C
let him know. The only way │
│ for you to govern is make your voice heard -
A
C
WRITE! │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ READER SURVEY 1993
A
C
│
│----------------------------------------------
A
C
------------------------------│
│ 1: YOUR AGE GROUP IS?
A
C
│
│ A: Under 25 4: HOW
A
C
OFTEN DO YOU READ EEEEKS? │
│ C: 26 to 35 A: E
A
C
very Single Issue! │
│ D: 36 to 45 B: 2
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C
-3 Times A Month │
│ E: 46 to 55 C: O
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nce A Month or Less │
│ F: 55 +
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│
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GENDER? │
│ 2: YOUR JOB: A: M
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ale B: Female │
│ A: White Collar/Mgmt
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│
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MANY BBSES DO YOU BELONG TO? │
│ C: Biz Owner/Self-Emp'd A: 1
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B: 2-3 C: 4-5 D: 5+ │
│ D: Unemployed/In School
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│
│ F: Other:______________ 7: DO Y
A
C
OU READ OTHER EMAGAZINES? │
│ A: Y
A
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es B: Some C: No │
│ 3: YEARLY INCOME:
A
C
│
│ A: Under $20,000 8: DO Y
A
C
OU CLASSIFY YOURSELF AS │
│ B: $20,000 - $39,000 COMP
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UTER LITERATE? │
│ C: $40,000 + A: Y
A
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es B: Somewhat C: No │
│----------------------------------------------
A
C
------------------------------│
│Please Mail To: EEEEK Publishing Co. PO Box 33
A
C
1, Manhattan Beach, CA. 90266 │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Eeeek BYTES! provides both the Business & En
A
C
d-User with A-1 PC Service..! │
│----------------------------------------------
A
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------------------------------│
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│
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Dvorak/Zoom│
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│
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│
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C
To Subscribe Call Today: │
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│
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└────────────────────────────────────┘A
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Idiot Savants
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│
A
C
│
│ This term is used in psychology to describe p
A
C
ersons of general low levels │
│ of intelligence who have an unusually high sk
A
C
ill in some area. What are a │
│ few examples of idiot savants? Well look at
A
C
THESE!: │
│
A
C
│
│ George, with an IQ between 60 and 70. This i
A
C
s the mental level of a child,│
│ and generally does not allow for much knowled
A
C
ge at all. Yet asked what day│
│ a particular date (ANY date, any century) fel
A
C
l on, he would answer within │
│ an instant and was very rarely incorrect! Fo
A
C
r instance, if asked what day │
│ of the week August 29, 1591 was - he would te
A
C
ll you... a Thursday. He could│
│ also perform such feats as what the 3rd Monda
A
C
y in May, 1936 (or ANY year) │
│ was. Charles could not add or subtract, mult
A
C
iply or divide, but he could │
│ tell you how old Abe Lincoln would if he were
A
C
alive today...or any other │
│ historical figure for that matter!
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ Then there was Tom Fuller, a slave in the 18t
A
C
h Century who was dubbed as │
│ "The Virginia Calculator". He had never lear
A
C
ned to read nor write and had │
│ never been taught any form of arithmetic, yet
A
C
it took him only 2 minutes to│
│ figure there are 47,304,000 seconds in a year
A
C
& ½. 1 minute to find that a │
│ man who lived 70 years,17 days,& 12 hours was
A
C
2,210,500,000 seconds old. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│
Be Percent
A
C
ageWISE!
A
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ 2% of American births are twins.
A
C
│
│
4% of American women do not own a s
A
C
ingle bra.
A
C
│
│ 6% of American men murdered are done in by wi
A
C
ves or girlfriends. │
│
8% of Americans have a heart condit
A
C
ion.
A
C
│
│10% of Americans are perfectly comfortable if
A
C
their house is a mess. │
│
12% of Americans lose their virginity
A
C
in a car.
A
C
│
│14% of Americans think science/technology has
A
C
done more harm than good. │
│
16% of America is Alaska.
A
C
A
C
│
│18% of Americans aged 25 to 29 are arrested.
A
C
│
│
20% of American 6th graders cannot loc
A
C
ate the United States on a world map.
A
C
│
│22% of Americans over 18 years old are single.
A
C
│
│
24% of Americans who commit murder nev
A
C
er appear in a courtroom.
A
C
│
│26% of American women enjoy sex more than they
A
C
do money. │
│
28% of Americans think that their job
A
C
is very exciting.
A
C
│
│30% of American women murdered are done in by
A
C
their husband or boyfriend. │
│
32% of America is owned by the Federal
A
C
Government.
A
C
│
│34% of American households have a microwave.
A
C
│
│
36% of American teenage girls favor th
A
C
e death penalty.
A
C
│
│38% of American women would like to improve th
A
C
eir buttocks. │
│
40% of Americans don't think a college
A
C
education is necessary to succeed.
A
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Oh SWIFT! BITS!
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│
"Waitress, could I have more coffee?" To
A
C
m PERKED up.
│
│ "Sorry for the mess, my maid quit..." Tom sai
A
C
d HELPLESSly. │
│
"Even with all that studying, I flunked
A
C
the exam!" Tom said TESTily.
│
│ "That's no beagle, it's a mongrel!" Tom MUTTe
A
C
red. │
│
"My favorite films are Chinese detective
A
C
flicks." Tom CHANted.
│
│ "Why don't you want to go visit the tombs?" T
A
C
om asked CRYPTically. │
│
"I am afraid to fly on airliners these d
A
C
ays." Tom said PLAINly.
│
│ "This is not the world's best Martini..." Tom
A
C
said DRYly. │
│
"Well it's not 100% cotton actually..."
A
C
Tom said SHEEPishly.
│
│ "When I die, I'm leaving you nothing!" Tom sa
A
C
id WILLfully. │
│
"My bank retracted their 4.33% gain poli
A
C
cy" Tom said with disINTEREST.
│
│ "I will NOT hand over my savings to the gover
A
C
nment" Tom said UNREMITTINGly.│
│
"..but my biggest fear is snakes!" Tom R
A
C
ATTLEd off.
│
│ "I think it's time to buy new underwear." Tom
A
C
BRIEFed him. │
│
"Cats keep themselves very clean!" Tom s
A
C
aid PERfectly clear.
│
│ "If you don't quiet your dog I'll call the co
A
C
ps!" Tom HOUNDed. │
│
"I can imitate any signature you show me
A
C
." Tom FORGEd.
│
│ "I think Chewing tobacco is much better for y
A
C
ou!" Tom SPAT. │
│
"I think I could really use a drink righ
A
C
t now..." Tom WHINEd.
│
│ "I bet I could get rich if I were an undertak
A
C
er" Tom PLOTted. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ The Code Of Love
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│
This "code" was drafted by a group
A
C
of women in May of '74; married women
A
C
│
│
mind you, all in the vanguard of th
A
C
e "lib" movement. Their goal was to
A
C
│
│
create for themselves and for other
A
C
s, a new set of ethics, some guidelines
A
C
│
│
for "liberated" conduct in modern t
A
C
imes. To paraphrase a rather lengthy
A
C
│
│
31 point treatise and its concludin
A
C
g remarks, read on:
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│
"Love cannot extend itself into mar
A
C
riage. This is because lovers must
A
C
│
│
grant everything to one another, mu
A
C
tually and gratuitously, without being
A
C
│
│
constrained by any motive of necess
A
C
ity. Husband and wife, on the other
A
C
│
│
hand, are bound by duty to deny eac
A
C
h other nothing. Considering that no
A
C
│
│
one should be deprived of love, bei
A
C
ng married must not prevent one from
A
C
│
│
seeking it elsewhere. The only req
A
C
uirements of extramarital lovers is
A
C
│
│
that they are honest, they are trul
A
C
y exciting, and they have achieved
A
C
│
│
adulthood. An insatiable appetite
A
C
of one partner for the other is consid-
A
C
│
│
ered to be ideal. No one can be ult
A
C
imately involved with two lovers at
A
C
│
│
the same time. But just as nothing
A
C
restricts one man from an affair with
A
C
│
│
two women, nothing prevents one wom
A
C
an from an affair with two men."
A
C
│
│
The Code of Love was written in Eur
A
C
ope, by a panel of activists who had
A
C
│
│
never heard of "Women's Lib", led b
A
C
y the Countess of Champagne. The really
A
C
│
│
strange part is that the document i
A
C
s dated May 3, A.D. 1174.
A
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│
▄███████ ██ ██ ▄███████ ▄███████▄
A
C
▄██████▄ ▄███████
┌──────────────│
│
██ ██ ██ ██ ██ ██
A
C
██ ██ ██
│ ADVERTISING │
│
██ ██▄ ▄██ ██ ██ ██
A
C
██ ██ ██
│ DOESN'T HAVE │
│
▀██████▄ ▀██████▀ ▀██████▄ ██ ██
A
C
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----------- d/CALAN │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ TV Trivials
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
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│
│ NBC TV's John Chancellor told of a rash o
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C
f UFO sightings. A woman │
│ who swore in a TV interview that she had see
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C
n Unidentified Flying Objects,│
│ was asked how she could be so sure that they
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were, in fact, unidentified │
│ flying objects. She confidently replied "Th
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ey had the letters UFO on the │
│ side."
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│
│
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│
│ Heard on the TV version of Family Feud.
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C
Richard Dawson had one of │
│ the contestants ready for the fast money rou
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nd, and he asked this question│
│ "Name the month when a woman first begins to
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C
show she's pregnant..." The │
│ contestant answered "September!" To which Ri
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chard Dawson sat down and │
│ laughed for 5 full minutes with the camera s
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C
till on him. │
│
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C
│
│ On one episode of the Newlywed game, Bob
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C
Eubanks was asking the │
│ question: "Where is the strangest place you
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C
and your husband have ever │
│ made whoopie?" to which one woman answered
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C
"That would have to be in │
│ the butt Bob." The audience and Bob Eubanks
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C
died laughing. │
│
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│
│ The NBC logo came over the screen, and the v
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oice said, " This is the CBS │
│ television...damn it!"
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│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ The Joker's Lair # 2
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│I'm currently out of work. I've been on sever
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C
al interviews though! I went │
│to the hospital's blood lab, but they said I w
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C
asn't the right type. I even │
│tried being a hooker, but I didn't have it in
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C
me and a job offer at R.J. │
│went up in smoke. For a while I was a trapeze
A
C
artist at the circus, but │
│then I was let go. If you hear of anything...
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C
│
│
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│
│
What kind of dog has 4 legs & 1 arm? ----
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C
------- A Pit Bull!
│
│
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C
│
│What do you get when you cross a Pit Bull with
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C
Lasssie? Give up yet? │
│A: A dog that rips your leg off and then runs
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C
for help. │
│
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C
│
│
Heard about Zsa Zsa's new fragrance? It's
A
C
called Conviction, just slap it on
│
│
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C
│
│Where do Trekkies go to work out? At the He's
A
C
Dead Gym. │
│
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C
│
│
There were these 2 country kids, sittin'
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C
in the middle o'nowhere with not a
│
│
thing to do. They decide to pool their m
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C
oney - all $1.32 of it - and one
│
│
goes off to the store. An hour later he
A
C
comes back & hands the other a bag
│
│
saying "NOW we have something to do!" Ope
A
C
ning it up the kid finds tampons.
│
│
The first says "See, we can go swimming,
A
C
horseback riding, sailing..."
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌──────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────────────────
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┐
│ WeIrD nEwS 1
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
A 20 year old Akron, Ohio, woman was hos
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C
pitalized for hypothermia after
│
│
spending 4 days underneath a man who had
A
C
died just after they had sex in
│
│
the front seat of a car. "I just though
A
C
t he was a hard sleeper" she said.
│
│
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C
│
│ In 1985 a Catholic Priest was arrested in Por
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C
t Richey, Florida, and charged│
│ with shoplifting a package of condoms from a
A
C
drug store. │
│
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C
│
│
In 1978, a Paris Grocer stabbed his wife
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C
to death with a wedge of cheese.
│
│
A
C
│
│ The Chico, California City Council enacted a
A
C
ban on nuclear weapons, │
│ setting a $500 fine for anyone detonating one
A
C
within the city limits. │
│
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C
│
│
A 30 year old Denver man entered a coupl
A
C
e's apartment at 2 am, took off all
│
│
his clothes and got into their waterbed
A
C
with them. The couple called the
│
│
police who arrived to find the intruder
A
C
still sleeping on the bed.
│
│
A
C
│
│ The Virginia Corrections Department decided t
A
C
o air-condition the death │
│ chamber at the State Penitentiary to make it
A
C
more comfortable for everyone.│
│
A
C
│
│
In Wyoming you must now have an official
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C
permit to photograph rabbits.
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Interesting Origins
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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C
──────────────────────────────┤
│
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│
│*Bagels were first made in 1683 in Vienna, Aus
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C
tria by a local Jewish │
│ baker. The baker wanted to thank the King of
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C
Poland for protecting his │
│ country from a Turkish invasion, so he made a
A
C
special hard roll in the │
│ King's honor. He designed the roll in the sh
A
C
ape of a stirrup since │
│ horseback riding was the King's favorite past
A
C
ime. The unique shape and │
│ the distinctive flavor of the bagel was born.
A
C
│
│
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C
│
│*You could have been eating a "Epsicle" on a h
A
C
ot summer day instead of a │
│ popsicle. When Frank Epperson, at the tender
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C
age of eleven, left a │
│ mixture of powdered soda mix and water on the
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C
back porch one winter night │
│ in 1905 the popsicle was born. When Frank fo
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C
und the mixture the next │
│ morning it was frozen solid with the stirring
A
C
stick still inside the jar, │
│ the soda frozen around it. Frank pulled the
A
C
frozen soda out of the jar │
│ by the handle of the stir stick and licked it
A
C
. The flavor was the same │
│ as that of the soda pop. He sat down and had
A
C
the first Epperson icicle, │
│ later called the Epsicle and finally the Pops
A
C
icle. Frank decided to call │
│ it the popsicle because it had been made from
A
C
the powdered soda mix. In │
│ 1923 Frank patented the popsicle, eighteen ye
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C
ars after his childhood │
│ discovery. Many enjoyed the Epsicle before t
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C
he patent. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Numerology By Manfr
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ed │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ Pythagoras said "The world is built upon the
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C
powers of numbers." It was he │
│ who broke down the universal numbers to 9 pri
A
C
mary ones: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9. │
│ The method is simply to ADD. An example: 6,43
A
C
2,555 would be 6+4+3+2+5+5+5 │
│ which equals 30, in turn 3+0=3 - In this man
A
C
ner, all numbers can be broken│
│ down into a single number. The same holds tr
A
C
ue for letters and words; the │
│ values are given as such:
1 2 3 4 5
A
C
6 7 8 9
│
│
A B C D E
A
C
F G H I
│
│
J K L M N
A
C
O P Q R
│
│
S T U V W
A
C
X Y Z
│
│C
1: The Sun; Leadership, creativity, pA
Cositiveness, extrovert, The Explorer. A
C
│
│ 2: The Moon; Sensitive, domestic, emotional,
A
C
musical, psychic, The Poet. │
│C
3: Jupiter; Materialistic, humorous, A
Cinquisitive, seeking, The Scientist. A
C
│
│ 4: Uranus; Eccentric, intuitive, sarcastic, f
A
C
air, intelligent, The Psychic.│
│C
5: Mercury; Inquisitive, friendly, orA
Cderly, communicative, The Teacher. A
C
│
│ 6: Venus; Gentle, agreeable, refined, diploma
A
C
tic, soothing, The Host. │
│C
7: Neptune; Very psychic, intelligentA
C, mysterious, giving. The SpiritualistA
C
│
│ 8: Saturn; Cold, pessimistic, humorless, mela
A
C
ncholic, The Cynic. │
│C
9: Mars; Active, emotional, loyal, imA
Cpulsive, suspicious, The Mother.C
│
│ As an example, lets decipher my name: MANFR
A
C
ED │
│C
4156954 = 34 = 7C
A
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌──────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────────────────
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┐
│ Great One-Liners
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C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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C
──────────────────────────────┤
│
True progress quietly and persistentl
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C
y moves along without notice.
│
│ "... the only purpose of diplomacy is
A
C
to prolong a crisis." │
│
An idea is not responsible for the pe
A
C
ople who believe in it.
│
│ Economy makes men independent.
A
C
│
│
Even a hawk is an eagle among crows.
A
C
│
│ History books which contain no lies ar
A
C
e extremely dull. │
│
How you look depends on where you go.
A
C
│
│ I must have slipped a disk - my pack h
A
C
urts. │
│
If you would keep a secret from an en
A
C
emy, tell it not to a friend.
│
│ It's sweet to be remembered, but it's
A
C
often cheaper to be forgotten.│
│
Let a fool hold his tongue and he wil
A
C
l pass for a sage.
│
│ Like winter snow on summer lawn, time
A
C
past is time gone. │
│
Put your brain in gear before startin
A
C
g your mouth.
│
│ Raising pet electric eels is gaining a
A
C
lot of current popularity. │
│
Some men are discovered; others are f
A
C
ound out.
│
│ The best prophet of the future is the
A
C
past. │
│
The best way to keep your friends is
A
C
not to give them away.
│
│ The minute a man is convinced that he
A
C
is interesting, he isn't. │
│
There is no fear in love; but perfect
A
C
love casteth out fear.
│
│ There's so much to say but your eyes k
A
C
eep interrupting me. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌──────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────────────────
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C
┐
│ Beyond Eternity BBS 213)-371-3734 . .
A
C
. * . . . │
│. . . . . . . . .
A
C
. . . . │
│ Have access to ALL Pblic Boards, DataBanks, O
A
C
n-Line Mags, & E-Mail FREE!!!!│
│.Subscribers get 50 PUS NEW FILES PER MONTH as
A
C
well as FILE REQUESTS! . │
│ [NOTE: Free Accountsdo NOT have upload/downlo
A
C
ad access!!] . * . . │
│ . . . . . . . . .
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C
. . . . . │
│ . . * . . . .
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C
. . . . │
│ . . . . . . .
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. * . . . * .│
│. . . . . * . .
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. . . . . . │
│ . . .
▄▄▄▄▄▄
.
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. . . . . . .
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. │
│ . .
││││││││
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. . .
▄▄▄▄▄▄
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. . . . │
│. * .
▐
│││
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│││││
.
▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄
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││││││││
. ▄█▄ ▄▄▄▄▄▄
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. . │
│ . .
▌
▒▒
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││││││││
.
║║║║║
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║║║║║║
││││││││
▄█████
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▄
││││││││
. . │
│.
▌▌▌
▒▒▒▒
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││││││││
│
║║║║║║║║║║║
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││││││││
███████
││
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│││
▌▌▌▌▌
║║
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│
│
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│││││││
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██
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││││
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║║
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│
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││││││││
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▌▌▌▌▌▌▌
││││
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██
│││
▌▌▌▌▌▌▌▌▌
║║A
C
║
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│││││││
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▌▌▌▌▌▌▌▌▌
│
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║║║
██
│││
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██
│││
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││││││
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──────────────────────────────┘
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Unpredictables!
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
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│
│ "The energy necessary to propel a ship would
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be many times greater than │
│ that required to drive a train of cars at the
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C
same speed; hence as a means │
│ of rapid transit, flying could not begin to c
A
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ompete with the railroad." │
│
FROM: POPULAR SC
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C
IENCE MAGAZINE, 1897
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C
│
│
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│
│ "At present, few scientists foresee any serio
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C
us or practical use for atomic│
│ energy. They regard the atom-splitting exper
A
C
iments as useful steps in │
│ the attempt to describe the atom more accurat
A
C
ely, not as the key to the │
│ unlocking of any new power."
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C
│
│
FROM: FORTUNE MA
A
C
GAZINE, 1938
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "While theoretically and technically televisi
A
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on may be feasible, │
│ commercially and financially I consider it an
A
C
impossibility, a development │
│ of which we need waste little time dreaming."
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C
│
│
FROM: LEE DeFORE
A
C
ST (Father of Radio), 1926
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "What can be more palpably absurd than the pr
A
C
ospect held out of locomotives│
│ traveling twice as fast as stagecoaches."
A
C
│
│
FROM: THE QUARTE
A
C
RLY REVIEW, 1825
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│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Quotes 'N' Notes
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2 │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ "If I love you, what business is it │ "I w
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C
as thrown out of college for │
│ of yours?" │ chea
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C
ting on the metaphysics exam; │
│ -*- Johann von Goethe (1749-1832) │ I lo
A
C
oked into the soul of the boy │
│───────────────────────────────────────┤ next
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to me." -*- Woody Allen │
│ "It's easier to stay out than get out"├──────
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──────────────────────────────│
│ -*- Mark Twain │ "The
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reason grandparents and grand│
│───────────────────────────────────────┤ -chil
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dren get along is that they │
│ "I like a woman with a head on her │ have
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a common enemy" -S.Levenson │
│ shoulders. I hate necks." ├──────
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──────────────────────────────│
│ -*- Steve Martin │ "I'm
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going to speak my mind be- │
│───────────────────────────────────────┤ cau
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se I have nothing to lose." │
│ "Too clever is dumb" - German Proverb │
A
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-*- S.I.Hayakawa │
│───────────────────────────────────────┼──────
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──────────────────────────────│
│ "It's been so long since I made love, │ "I n
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ever met a man I didn't want │
│ I can't even remember who gets tied │ to f
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C
ight." -*- Lyle Alzado │
│ up." -*- Joan Rivers ├──────
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──────────────────────────────│
│───────────────────────────────────────┤ "The
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re is hardly anyone whose sex │
│ "I believe that pro-wrestling is clean│-life,
A
C
if broadcast, would not fill │
│ and everything else in the world is │ the w
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orld at large with surprise & │
│ fixed." -*- Frank Deford │ horro
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r." -*- W. Somerset Maugham │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Quick Quiz
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
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│
│A: WHO said:"I don't need necessarily to live
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like this. I can be very │
│ happy living in a one-bedroom apa
A
C
rtment, believe me."? │
│B: WHO was admitted to the Mayo Clinic for rem
A
C
oval of one of his ribs? │
│C: WHO said: "I now have more Paternity Suits
A
C
than Leisure Suits!"? │
│D: WHO admitted on NBC's Today Show, that he d
A
C
oesn't say "I Love You" even │
│ to his wife or grandchildren?
A
C
│
│E: WHO made the slip that Christianity was "a
A
C
religion for losers", and then│
│ appeared on Cable News Network to publi
A
C
cly apologize? │
│F: WHO said: "The cosmetic companies have miss
A
C
ed a good bet by not at least │
│ asking me [for a product endorse
A
C
ment]." │
│G: WHO said: "I think marriage in a church mak
A
C
es sense for deeply religious │
│ people. I'm not."?
A
C
│
│H: WHO said: "I suspect I would have been prom
A
C
iscuous if I'd been a woman."?│
│I: WHO said: "I SAID I was into PORN again, no
A
C
t Born again!" ? │
│
A
C
│
│ANSWERS:
A
C
│
│ A: Donald Trump D: Richard Nixon
A
C
G: Mikhail Baryshnikov │
│ B: Billy Graham E: Ted Turner
A
C
H: Norman Mailer │
│ C: Engelbert Humperdinck F: Tammy Faye Bakk
A
C
er I: Billy Idol │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Boardwatch 100 Reader's Choice Bulletin Board
A
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Contest │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ B O A R D W A T C H M A G A Z I N E Ann
A
C
ounces: │
│ The Boardwatch 100 Reader's Choice Bulleti
A
C
n Board Contest for 1993 │
│
A
C
│
│ WIN A FREE HIGH SPEED MODEM
A
C
│
│ Boardwatch Magazine is sponsoring a contest
A
C
to find the 100 most popular │
│ bulletin board systems in North America - an
A
C
d the ONE BBS most popular │
│ among callers. The contest will run from Ja
A
C
nuary 1, 1993 through July 1, │
│ 1993. Winners will be announced at the Onli
A
C
ne Networking Exposition and │
│ BBS Convention (ONE BBSCON) held at the Broa
A
C
dmoor Hotel in Colorado │
│ Springs Colorado, August 25-29, 1993. The Bo
A
C
ardwatch 100 list will be │
│ published in subsequent issues of Boardwatch
A
C
Magazine and distributed in │
│ electronic form world-wide.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ PRIZES FOR BULLETIN BOARD OPERATORS
A
C
│
│ 1ST PRIZE: Air fare, hotel accommodations an
A
C
d registration at ONE BBSCON │
│ for one is awarded to the system receiving t
A
C
he most votes. Additionally, │
│ the system will receive a free full-page bla
A
C
ck and white advertisement in │
│ Boardwatch Magazine for a period of three mo
A
C
nths. An award trophy will │
│ be presented at the ONE BBSCON and a feature
A
C
story on their BBS will │
│ appear in a subsequent issue of the magazine
A
C
.. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Boardwatch 100 Reader's Choice Bulletin Board
A
C
Contest │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ TOP 10: The 10 most popular BBSes selected by
A
C
the voters will each receive │
│ an award trophy during a special presentation
A
C
at the Online Networking │
│ Exposition & BBS Convention (ONE BBSCON) Augu
A
C
st 25-29, 1993. Additionally, │
│ a story describing their system will appear i
A
C
n Boardwatch Magazine, they │
│ will be included in a special TOP TEN BBS lis
A
C
ting in the magazine, & will │
│ receive a free 1/4 page black & white adverti
A
C
sement in 3 successive issues.│
│ Finally, they'll be listed in the Boardwatch
A
C
100 BBS list. │
│
A
C
│
│ TOP ONE HUNDRED: The 100 bulletin boards rece
A
C
iving the most votes will │
│ each be listed in the Boardwatch 100 readers
A
C
choice BBS list. This list │
│ will be published in Boardwatch Magazine and
A
C
freely distributed │
│ electronically on thousands of bulletin board
A
C
s world-wide. │
│
A
C
│
│ PRIZES FOR VOTERS: All valid ballots submitte
A
C
d by voters will be entered │
│ in a random sweepstakes drawing. As of the op
A
C
ening date of this contest, │
│ prizes include TWO U.S. ROBOTICS COURIER DUAL
A
C
STANDARD 16.8K MODEMS, two │
│ HAYES OPTIMA 14400 + FAX 144 modems, & two Zy
A
C
XEL U-1496 14,400 bps modems │
│ - & more are on the way. A minimum of six va
A
C
lid ballots will be selected │
│ from all entries & each will receive a free m
A
C
odem - from the most popular │
│ modem manufacturers in the world.
A
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Boardwatch 100 Reader's Choice Bulletin Board
A
C
Contest │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ RULES FOR CALLERS: Each voter can vote once,
A
C
for a single bulletin board │
│ system. Each ballot must be fully completed,
A
C
& individually mailed by each │
│ voter. One vote per address, & we will verify
A
C
ballots as necessary. There │
│ are three ways to vote:
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ 1. Printout and complete this ballot and mai
A
C
l to: │
│ BOARDWATCH MAGAZINE
A
C
│
│ READERS CHOICE BBS CONTEST
A
C
│
│ 5970 South Vivian Street
A
C
│
│ Littleton, CO 80127
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ 2. Print out, complete this ballot and FAX t
A
C
o (303)973-3731. │
│
A
C
│
│ 3. Or, dial the Boardwatch BBS at (303)973-4
A
C
222 and complete the online │
│ ballot provided on the main menu.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ Balloting closes at 23:59:59,
A
C
June 30, 1993. │
│
A
C
│
│ This contest is not limited to Boardwatch Ma
A
C
gazine subscribers, and no │
│ purchase of any kind is required to particip
A
C
ate in this contest. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Boardwatch 100 Reader's Choice Bulletin Board
A
C
Contest │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ NOTE: We held this contest during 1992 and i
A
C
t generated 11,152 votes by │
│ the close of balloting for some 1250 differe
A
C
nt BBSes. The TOP system │
│ received about 450 votes. Your individual vo
A
C
te can have a tremendous │
│ impact on the outcome of this contest. Furt
A
C
her, the odds of winning a │
│ modem in last years contest, were 1 in 1394
A
C
(8 modems awarded). │
│
A
C
│
│ RULES FOR BBS OPERATORS: Bulletin Board Oper
A
C
ators may encourage callers │
│ to vote for their system by offering whateve
A
C
r inducements/encouragements │
│ they like. There is one rule to this contest
A
C
for BBS operators. YOU MAY │
│ NOT HANDLE ANY VOTE AFTER THE CALLER HAS COM
A
C
PLETED THE BALLOT. YOU MAY NOT│
│ HANDLE IT IN ANY WAY.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ You may provide callers with anything you li
A
C
ke, including postage paid │
│ envelopes, printed matter, solicitations, et
A
C
c. But once they've completed │
│ a ballot, if you touch, handle, or otherwise
A
C
deal with the ballot in any │
│ way, your BBS will be disqualified from the
A
C
contest without appeal or │
│ recourse.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ If you wish to post an electronic ballot on
A
C
your BBS, you may post this │
│ file IN ITS ENTIRETY. You may post any addi
A
C
tional information you feel │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Boardwatch 100 Reader's Choice Bulletin Board
A
C
Contest │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ is appropriate, but this entire rules file mu
A
C
st be available to all │
│ callers.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ Despite the fact that this contest has a mini
A
C
mum of rules, this one rule │
│ does cause problems each year. You cannot pos
A
C
t online surveys or doors to │
│ allow voters to vote online. This is vote han
A
C
dling. You cannot accept │
│ ballots & mail or fax them in for callers. T
A
C
he rule of thumb is pretty │
│ clear: You can provide anything you like TO c
A
C
allers to induce them to vote.│
│ There is NOTHING you can accept FROM callers
A
C
in any way pertaining to this │
│ ballot at all. THEY must complete the ballot
A
C
& forward it to us themselves.│
│
A
C
│
│ We actually received FEDEX packages on the fi
A
C
nal day of the contest last │
│ year from BBS operators who claimed to have c
A
C
ollected a hundred or so │
│ votes. Infractions are dealt with quite econ
A
C
omically - the BBS is │
│ summarily disqualified without recourse or ap
A
C
peal. │
│
A
C
│
│ One new element introduced in the 1993 contes
A
C
t is date scoring. All │
│ ballots received from 1 January 1993 through
A
C
30 June 1993 will receive a │
│ date score based on the date of receipt. Dat
A
C
e scores will range from 180 │
│ for votes received 1 January down to 1 for vo
A
C
tes received on June 30. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Boardwatch 100 Reader's Choice Bulletin Board
A
C
Contest │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ These date stamp values are cummulative for e
A
C
ach BBS and will be used to │
│ eliminate ALL ties in the TOP 100. Since tie
A
C
s are quite common in this │
│ contest, it pays to get your votes in early.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ This contest is open to all BBSes worldwide w
A
C
ith the sole exception of the │
│ Boardwatch Magazine BBS - which is ineligible
A
C
. Commercial services such as │
│ Prodigy, America Online, CompuServe, are cons
A
C
idered to be networks and not │
│ bulletin boards for the purposes of this cont
A
C
est. HOWEVER, individual │
│ forums, roundtables, or special interest area
A
C
s moderated by a specific │
│ human SYSOP on those services & allowing call
A
C
ers to post messages in that │
│ specific area ARE considered to be bulletin b
A
C
oards for the purposes of this│
│ contest and may participate.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ BOARDWATCH MAGAZINE
A
C
│
│ 5970 South Vivian Street
A
C
│
│ Littleton, CO 80127
A
C
│
│ FAX: (303)973-3731.
A
C
│
│ BBS: (303)973-4222
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ Balloting closes at 23:59:59,
A
C
June 30, 1993. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Boardwatch 100 Reader's Choice Bulletin Board
A
C
Contest-BALLOT │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ *********************************************
A
C
******************************│
│ BOARDWATCH 100 READERS CHOICE BBS CONTEST
A
C
1993 BALLOT FORM│
│ Because Eeeeks is 24 lines per page, ballot f
A
C
orm continues next page... │
│ *********************************************
A
C
******************************│
│ Mail to: BOARDWATCH MAGAZINE READERS, C
A
C
HOICE BBS CONTEST │
│ 5970 S Vivian St Littleton,
A
C
CO 80127 │
│ BBS INFORMATION:
A
C
│
│ TITLE OF BBS YOU NOMINATE AS BEST BBS:_______
A
C
_____________________________ │
│ PRIMARY BBS ACCESS TELEPHONE NUMBER: _______
A
C
_____________________________ │
│
A
C
│
│ VOTER VERIFICATION INFORMATION: Voter informa
A
C
tion will be used to verify a │
│ selected sampling of caller ballots. Response
A
C
s to certain questions will be│
│ used to produce aggregate statistical informa
A
C
tion on BBS callers to be │
│ published in Boardwatch Magazine in future is
A
C
sues. All information required│
│ Incomplete ballots will be discarded
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ VOTER NAME: _________________________________
A
C
_____________________________ │
│ STREET ADDRESS: _____________________________
A
C
_____________________________ │
│ CITY: _________________________________ STATE
A
C
/PROVINCE: __________________ │
│ ZIP OR POSTAL CODE: ___________________ COUNT
A
C
RY: _________________________ │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Boardwatch 100 Reader's Choice Bulletin Board
A
C
Contest-BALLOT │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ VOTER VOICE TELEPHONE NUMBER: _______________
A
C
_____________________________ │
│ AGE:____ SEX: [ ] M [ ] F PROFESSION:_____
A
C
_____________________________ │
│ COMMUNICATIONS SOFTWARE USED: _______________
A
C
_____________________________ │
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Dimensions In The Dark by J.L. Blac
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k │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ I contemplated what he had just said. He sai
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C
d that we could not, even │
│ joined together, fight this entities power.
A
C
Thomas must have known the │
│ business of forming a circle would not work.
A
C
He must have been │
│ grasping at straws, as I had been all evening
A
C
. I was quietly waiting │
│ his recollection of the rest of his conversat
A
C
ion with the entity. │
│
A
C
│
│ "I think he said something to the effect that
A
C
we even generated his │
│ power for him. I'm not sure how this could b
A
C
e true." │
│
A
C
│
│ "Perhaps he meant we give him more power thro
A
C
ugh our fears." │
│
A
C
│
│ "Of course that is what he meant," Thomas alm
A
C
ost yelled, "because he │
│ seemed to gloat about his control. He also s
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C
aid that conquest is not │
│ only a right but also a duty. He even commen
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ted about the horror that │
│ was displayed on your face."
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C
│
│
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C
│
│ It was not horror or terror on my face. Thou
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C
gh I did not try to │
│ dispute this with Thomas at this moment. It
A
C
was more astonishment than │
│ anything. I had felt the power of this man w
A
C
hen I had stepped onto the │
│ porch earlier in the evening. Even then I di
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C
d not recall feeling │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Dimensions In The Dark by J.L. Blac
A
C
k │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│
A
C
│
│ terror or horror, some fear, but mostly bewil
A
C
derment. For at the time, │
│ I did not understand what was going on nor di
A
C
d I comprehend the force │
│ of the wall of power I had collided.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "Then, Thomas," I questioned, "We should be a
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C
ble to do something about │
│ this power."
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "But what? We've already tried putting our p
A
C
ower together. Or at │
│ least you and the others have tried. You cou
A
C
ld not match his power. │
│ He said we would not."
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "Yes, I know what he said." I stood and walke
A
C
d down the stairs, │
│ contemplating my thoughts, then walked back u
A
C
p to where Thomas remained │
│ seated. "Yes, but perhaps that too is an ill
A
C
usion. Perhaps it is only │
│ what he desired us to believe. Maybe he does
A
C
n't...." │
│
A
C
│
│ "Have that sort of power at all." Thomas inte
A
C
rrupted. "I think he │
│ doesn't. He is held to the house. He told m
A
C
e himself that the porch │
│ was his limit, his boundary."
A
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Dimensions In The Dark by J.L. Blac
A
C
k │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ "Anna would not have been on the walk by the
A
C
house if this were not │
│ true Thomas. She told me she could not, or d
A
C
id not have the power to │
│ fight his strength. She even brought a compa
A
C
nion, I think my father, │
│ to aid her in her strength at one point."
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "Okay," Thomas concluded the analysis was ove
A
C
r. "How do we change │
│ things?"
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "Convincing the others to believe this is an
A
C
illusion will be │
│ impossible." I looked at Thomas for suggestio
A
C
ns. │
│
A
C
│
│ "Why? Don't you think they will understand?"
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "No, well yes they'll understand but I doubt
A
C
if they will believe it. │
│ We've gone to them twice with different theor
A
C
ies. Once with the theory │
│ of pulling them through the dimensional door,
A
C
and then with the theory │
│ of generating a circle of love to overpower h
A
C
is energy. They are not │
│ about to buy this."
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "They might. We could try. I think we could
A
C
convince them, if we put │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Dimensions In The Dark by J.L. Blac
A
C
k │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ it to them properly."
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "Are you part of the House of Lords? You sou
A
C
nded like a politician │
│ just then."
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ "Very funny. My country doesn't have politic
A
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ians we have Statesmen." │
│ After a moment of hesitation he said with a c
A
C
huckle, "We have Statesmen │
│ that just happen to sound like politicians."
A
C
│
│
A
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│
│ I did not respond to his little quip. We did
A
C
not have time for small │
│ talk. Convincing these people would be impos
A
C
sible, of this I was │
│ certain. But we could try something else.
A
C
│
│
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C
│
│ "Thomas, I have an idea. Since the others ar
A
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e not going to be easily │
│ convinced, let's not convince them. Let's cr
A
C
eate another illusion for │
│ them. While their attention is drawn to it,
A
C
then we can remove them │
│ from the illusion he has created."
A
C
│
│
A
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│
│ "Sounds good to me Carol, but how? And what
A
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about his power. The more │
│ we try, the more power or strength he'll exer
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C
t." │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
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────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Dimensions In The Dark by J.L. Blac
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k │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│
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│
│ "Not if he is distracted," I said, then fell
A
C
to silent contemplation. │
│
A
C
│
│ "What do you mean Carol," Thomas pulled me fr
A
C
om my thoughts, │
│ "distracted how?"
A
C
│
│
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C
│
│ "By you." I said matter of factually.
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C
│
│
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│
│ "By me," he rose now, as if in protest, " I d
A
C
on't understand." │
│
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│
│ "It has to be you. You are the one who talke
A
C
d to him. You are the │
│ only one that could hear him. You must draw
A
C
his attention away from │
│ the hotel and the others. While you do this,
A
C
I'll try to create │
│ another illusion for them, so they can be fre
A
C
ed." │
│
A
C
│
│ "If only we could convince them to believe no
A
C
ne of this is real." │
│ Thomas stopped talking.
A
C
│
│
A
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│
│ "Theoretically we believe that is true. But
A
C
we really have no way to │
│ test the theory." I responded. to be c
A
C
ontinued.... │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
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───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Team Eeeek: Dawning of An Age Part 14
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│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
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──────────────────────────────┤
│ The Higher Levels
A
C
│
│
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│
│ Floating as he was above the room, feeling hi
A
C
s molecules slowly │
│ dissipate, the Krausmeyer realized that his p
A
C
erception had improved. No, │
│ more than that, his ability to see into physi
A
C
cal entities, such as human │
│ beings, had achieved a laser-like precision a
A
C
nd an omnipotent │
│ understanding. At the higher levels humans we
A
C
re exposed for what they │
│ were, quickly oscillating vibrations of light
A
C
; and any "malfunction," │
│ such as anger or lack of love, could be detec
A
C
ted by the unevenness of the │
│ pulsations. Hymie saw that the Team Eeeek co
A
C
nference room was bathed in │
│ hot shades of irregular reds.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ At the higher levels words were perceived as
A
C
fluctuations in heat; and │
│ these words were sweating. But as Hymie moved
A
C
out and among the lights │
│ and the heat, he discovered that he was not a
A
C
lone. │
│
A
C
│
│ Surrounding and riding above each human body
A
C
lay a sheath of finer, │
│ higher vibrations than those of the body itse
A
C
lf. As Hymie found one for │
│ each of the lower collections of light, he re
A
C
alized that they belonged to │
│ the members of Team Eeeek. These must be the
A
C
"higher selves" that Sarina │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Team Eeeek: Dawning of An Age Part 14
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ had talked about.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ But what good did any of this do now? Carpen
A
C
ter, drenched in dark tones │
│ and lower vibrations, was near to being expel
A
C
led from the group, and... │
│ .and now Hymie suddenly knew why!
A
C
│
│ Carpenter had been protecting him! Carp had f
A
C
ound records which proved │
│ that Hymie had broadcast sensitive informatio
A
C
n across the country! As │
│ Hymie understood it now, he had inadvertently
A
C
shipped Bee's │
│ Interdisciplinary Software out in an Electron
A
C
ic Mail Packet! And Carp had │
│ attempted to cover up the blunder! That was
A
C
what this was all about! │
│
A
C
│
│ "Humans," Hymie thought. "They worry about su
A
C
ch meaningless things. None │
│ of it matters." From where he was, Hymie coul
A
C
d see thousands of more │
│ interesting, more useful computer possibiliti
A
C
es; they were all so clear, │
│ so simple. And he would have smiled off the
A
C
entire affair and moved on │
│ into the higher, purer vibrations above had n
A
C
ot he realized the │
│ importance all this had for the less enlighte
A
C
ned pulsations below. │
│
A
C
│
│ Hymie looked to the "higher selves" hovering
A
C
above each of the Team Eeeek │
│ members and tried to attract their attention.
A
C
He thought that if he could │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Team Eeeek: Dawning of An Age Part 14
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ simply smile with each of them in turn, the p
A
C
roblems below would │
│ disappear. And they would have. Except that t
A
C
he little man couldn't │
│ entice any of his companions to notice his pr
A
C
esence. Oh, they knew he │
│ was there, all right; they just refused to lo
A
C
ok at him. │
│
A
C
│
│ That's when Hymie Krausmeyer, street urchin a
A
C
nd mental deficient on the │
│ physical plane, recognized the root of human
A
C
suffering. │
│
A
C
│
│ "Look!" the little man wanted to shout. "That
A
C
is your brother! His │
│ distress is caused by YOUR rejection, not by
A
C
his 'mistakes'!" But they │
│ wouldn't listen. All these "geniuses" that Hy
A
C
mie had admired and │
│ respected down below wouldn't yield a particl
A
C
e of their arrogance in │
│ order to relieve the unhappiness of their tea
A
C
mmate. │
│
A
C
│
│ A great many things occurred then that the Kr
A
C
ausmeyer would remember even │
│ at his lower vibrations. The little man found
A
C
that he could reform his │
│ light into any pattern or design that he coul
A
C
d conceive. And his growing │
│ frustration found many bizarre expressions.
A
C
He somehow expected to │
│ attract his teammates with his display but th
A
C
eir strength of obstinacy │
│ kept them focused on the petty events below.
A
C
That's when the Krausmeyer │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Team Eeeek: Dawning of An Age Part 14
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ began to explode.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ Hymie flew out among the higher levels and th
A
C
rew his molecules in every │
│ direction. As they left the pull of his consc
A
C
iousness they took on an │
│ array of colors and intensities which excelle
A
C
d any pyrotechnic display │
│ the Krausmeyer had ever seen below. From the
A
C
little man's perspective, │
│ the experience was one of expanding his consc
A
C
iousness. He realized that │
│ he hadn't "thrown" himself but had 'let go' o
A
C
f his mental hold on the │
│ parts of light that he had known as 'Hymie Kr
A
C
ausmeyer.' Somewhere in │
│ passing, he knew that he could have accomplis
A
C
hed more, travelled farther, │
│ experienced the totality of existence, if he
A
C
had been able to release his │
│ passion. Yet without passion he would not ha
A
C
ve felt the need to help │
│ Carpenter.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ The little man focused his light, intensified
A
C
it, drew it into a fine │
│ point; and with this edge he launched himself
A
C
at the 'higher levels' of │
│ his teammates. As the Krausmeyer's intensity
A
C
hacked at the denser │
│ collections of light, he thought that to affe
A
C
ct them he would have to │
│ enter them - like a probe - and by lancing th
A
C
eir fields they would be │
│ altered.
A
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Team Eeeek: Dawning of An Age Part 14
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ Not true. His higher vibrational force merel
A
C
y passed through those of │
│ his physical friends without their notice.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ He would be forced deal with them on their le
A
C
vels. Matching his │
│ vibration to each in turn, the Krausmeyer flu
A
C
ng his light at his │
│ teammates, battering them to... to... ...to
A
C
do what? Hymie didn't know. │
│ But as his exertions in the lower vibrations
A
C
sapped his strength, the │
│ Krausmeyer knew that he would have to have th
A
C
eir attention before any │
│ change could occur.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ With that sad realization, the little man sen
A
C
t his vibrational field │
│ smashing into those of his friends.
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│ To be continued.
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
│
A
C
│
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Strrrrrrrange BITS!
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ He was sitting up watching television, no one
A
C
else was around, when he │
│ heard the door close behind him. He turned a
A
C
nd looked around, no one was │
│ there and the door was closed. But this man
A
C
was not the first to hear │
│ something and have nothing there. Others had
A
C
similar experiences as well. │
│ One man, when on watch late at night alone, h
A
C
eard someone walking around │
│ upstairs. Finally he got up to see who was u
A
C
p. He found everyone asleep. │
│ As soon as he returned to the downstairs, he
A
C
heard someone walking around │
│ again. He rushed upstairs, hoping to find th
A
C
e person playing the joke on │
│ him. But all the others were sound asleep.
A
C
No one could have gotten back │
│ into bed that quickly.
A
C
│
│ Others sleeping in the dormitory complain abo
A
C
ut hearing people going up and│
│ down the stairs throughout the night. None o
A
C
f them ever get a full night │
│ of sound sleep.
A
C
│
│ Others have said they have seen a person at n
A
C
ight at one end of the dorm- │
│ itory.
A
C
│
│ This is a classic haunt. Doors opening and c
A
C
losing, footsteps of someone │
│ walking up and down stairs and pacing the flo
A
C
or. But the place is not a │
│ likely place. It takes place in a firehouse
A
C
in a residential section of │
│ Syracuse New York, 176 West Seneca Turnpike.
A
C
│
│ Who is haunting, no one is certain. Some fir
A
C
emen believe the spirit is │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Strrrrrrrrange BITS!
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ somehow related to the Indian burial ground n
A
C
earby. Others believe it is │
│ probably a old fire fighter who has passed on
A
C
but can't seem to give up │
│ the job.
A
C
│
│ The building was built in 1927. Prior to the
A
C
firehouse being built the │
│ land had great historical value. It was at o
A
C
ne time, in the early 1700s, │
│ a stagecoach trail and drill grounds for the
A
C
Revolutionary War and was once│
│ part of an American Indians' homeland.
A
C
│
│ The ghost does not seem to bother anyone. He
A
C
seems to have his own busi- │
│ ness to take care of and basically ignores ev
A
C
eryone else. He does not │
│ seem to cause fear as much as he causes a dis
A
C
ruption in the firemen's │
│ sleeping patterns. But it has happened both
A
C
day and night. │
│ ────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────── │
│ Our next haunting involves an apartment in Ne
A
C
w York City in the Chelsea │
│ area. People would often complain of loud pa
A
C
rties taking place on this │
│ second floor apartment. One woman that lived
A
C
below this apartment even │
│ accused the two girls living in the apartment
A
C
of being prostitutes. She │
│ said she could hear men talking at all hours
A
C
of the day and night and she │
│ would hear them take their shoes off and drop
A
C
them on the floor. But the │
│ two girls that lived in the apartment were no
A
C
t prostitutes and were rarely │
│ at home when these incidents occurred. Other
A
C
s on the floor below said │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌─────────────────────────────────────
A
C
───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Strrrrrrrrange BITS!
A
C
│
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ they could hear parties going on upstairs. S
A
C
ome even called the police. │
│ When the police showed up they found nothing,
A
C
no party, or anything else. │
│ But this wasn't the only spot of activity. T
A
C
he basement also had its own │
│ experiences. Many times people have reported
A
C
seeing a woman in this apart-│
│ ment when in fact no one was home or around.
A
C
│
│ The two girls moved out of the second floor a
A
C
partment and an couple moved │
│ in. One night the woman was in bed waiting f
A
C
or her husband to come home, │
│ who had to work very late that night. She he
A
C
ard her husband come through │
│ the front door and soon she felt someone sit
A
C
down on the bed. When she │
│ rolled over to talk to her husband, there was
A
C
no one there. She quickly │
│ turned on the light, and sure enough, no one
A
C
was in the bedroom at all. │
│ She got up to see where husband was; but she
A
C
found no one else in the │
│ apartment. She never wanted to stay in the a
A
C
partment alone again. │
│ Some say it isn't haunted as much as it is a
A
C
time warp. Where the past │
│ seems to hang over and cross into the present
A
C
at different times. The │
│ piano music that has been heard gives many th
A
C
e idea that this is true. │
│ The music is of a different period of history
A
C
, popular music of an era. │
│ Most of the incidents occurred at night, but
A
C
a small amount of activity │
│ has been reported during the day. Another re
A
C
port is that the events are │
│ related to a lady who practiced black magic i
A
C
n the apartment. │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┘
┌────────────────────────────────────
A
C
────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ (c)1993 Eeeek Publishing Company -Taghadoss
A
C
i/Black. Eeeek Publishing │
│ & US Datanet are mutual distributors of Eee
A
C
ek BITS! & DCN! │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ BEYOND ETERNITY BBS: 310-371-3734 (12-9600)
A
C
310-370-9464 (3-2400) │
│ Contact the #5 Account, The Editor, for inf
A
C
o, ad rates etc. │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
│ EEEEK PUBLISHING COMPANY P.O. Box # 331,
A
C
Manhattan Beach CA 90266 │
├──────────────────────────────────────────────
A
C
──────────────────────────────┤
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A
C
IAL! You may NOT Change or │
│ alter it in ANY manner without violating bo
A
C
th Federal & International │
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